Genesis 18
God goes for a walk. Sarah laughs at God. Abraham negotiates God down to 10.
18:1-5 Abraham sees three men walking, recognizes God, and runs up to them. He offers them food and drink. God eats bread and drinks wine? Who are the other two dudes? Or is this the introduction of God as a trinity?
18:6-11 Abraham tells Sarah God is there and tells her to make cakes (bread?). Abraham has a calf slaughtered and serves "them" (God or God and his companions). God promises Abraham a son by Sarah, but Abraham and Sarah are old, and Sarah is post-menopausal.
18:12-15 Sarah laughs at the idea of having a child at her age. God gets offended and asks why Sarah is laughing. Sarah then lies, claiming she didn't laugh, and God insists she did.
18:16-19 God contemplates telling Abraham about what he plans to do, saying he and his house and his descendants will all worship God.
18:20-25 God sent the two that were with him to Sodom and Gomorrah. Abraham asked God if he would destroy both the good and bad people of Sodom. He starts to bargain with God, saying if there are X number of righteous, will you spare the city? He challenges God, saying, "Shall not the judge of all the earth do right?"
18:26-33 God concedes to spare the city if he can find fifty righteous men. Abraham is astonished because he feels lowly compared to God. They negotiate a bit, each time God agreeing to spare the city if X number of righteous men can be found, finally ending at ten.
Genesis 19
Sodom and Gomorrah are destroyed. Lot's an incestuous pedophile.
19:1-3 Two angels entered Sodom (presumably the two that were with God when he found Abraham). Lot sees them and welcomes them into his home. The angels wanted to sleep in the street, but Lot persisted.
19:4-10 The men of Sodom surrounded Lot's house, demanding that the two visitors be sent out so they can have sex with them. Lot begged them not to say such things, and offered his two virgin daughters in exchange for the two men (angels). The mob turns on Lot, and the angels pull him back into the house. Really? Allowing an angry mob to rape your two virgin daughters is acceptable?
19:11-13 The angels blind the men in the mob, then ask Lot how many are in his family and where they are. They tell him God sent them to destroy the city.
19:14-16 Lot goes to his sons-in-law and tells them they have to leave the city, but they don't believe him. In the morning the angels tell Lot to leave, but he lingered, so the angels took him, his wife, and his two young daughters by the hand and took them out of the city.
18:17-26 The angels tell them to run away into the mountains, instructing them not to look back. Lot argues that he can't go into the mountains because it's dangerous; he asks to go to the nearby city of Zoar instead. God rains fire and brimstone on Sodom and Gomorrah (volcano?). Lot's wife looked behind them and she turned into a pillar of salt.
18:27-30 Abram sees the destruction left by Sodom and Gomorrah. Lot finally flees to the mountains to live in a cave.
18:31-38 Lot's daughters decide to get him drunk and have sex with him. Both of them got pregnant. This doesn't seem to be an issue - there are no punishments for the girls or for Lot for their incestuous relations.
Chapter 20
Sarah causes another king to be cursed because she lies (again).
20:1-6 Abraham and Sarah travel again. Abraham claims Sarah is his wife again. The king of Gerar stole Sarah in the night. God came to king Abimelech in a dream and told him Sarah was some one's wife. Ablimelech told God he hadn't touched her, and asked if God would destroy his nation. He explains that Abraham called Sarah his sister, and she confirmed it. God agrees that the king is blameless.
20:7-13 God commands king Ablimelech to give Sarah back to Abraham, saying Abraham is a prophet. King Ablimelech calls Abraham to him and asks why he set him up to sin. Abraham explains that he and Sarah have the same father, but not the same mother, and that every time they travel he asks her to pretend to be his sister, not his wife.
20:14-16 King Ablimelech gave Abraham back Sarah, in addition to servants and livestock and a thousand silver pieces, and told Abraham he could live anywhere within his lands that he chose. The king also chastised Sarah,
20:17-18 Abraham prayed to God to heal king Abimelech's wives and maidservants, because God had made them barren when the king took Sarah. Why is the king's household punished? They did nothing knowingly wrong - Sarah and Abraham are the ones who lied and caused the problems, yet the king's family is the one to pay the price of the sin.
Genesis 21
Sarah has Isaac. Hagar and Ishmael are sent into the desert. God saves Ishmael by using Abraham as a tool.
21:1-8 Sarah finally gets pregnant and they name the boy Isaac.
21:9-10 Sarah caught Ishmael teasing Isaac. Sarah demands that Abraham throw his second wife, Hagar, and her son by him, Ishmael, out of the house, claiming Ishmael is not to be equal with Isaac or heir to Abraham's holdings.
21:11 Abraham didn't want to send Ishmael away. God told him not to worry, that he would make a nation from Ishmael as well as Isaac, so Abraham packed some bread and water and sent them away. Hagar wanders with her child in Beersheba.
21:15 When the water ran out, Hagar put Ishmael under a bush because she didn't want to watch him die. God hears Ishmael crying and tells Hagar to pick him back up, that he will make a nation from him, then he makes a well appear in front of her.
21:20-21 Ishmael survived. He grew up in the wilderness with his mother and became an archer, and married an Egyptian woman.
21:22-33 King Abimelech makes Abraham swear by God to be honest in all his dealings with him and his family. Abraham chastised the king, saying his servants had taken a well violently from Abraham's servants; the king claims he didn't know. Abraham gives the king livestock as an agreement, and asks the king to bear witness that he is digging a new well. They call the well Beersheba. It looks like God makes Abraham provide for Hagar and Ishmael by digging the well, even though he sent them out into the wilderness. Kind of neat the way the story wrapped back in on itself.
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